Sunday, February 17, 2008

Ecclesiastical

Today's my birthday. No different than any other day. Another here, another gone. Another stuck in this same rut that I've been in since I don't know how long. Everday seems like the same thing. Eventhough, I have a different site at work now its work all night sleep all day and try to find something to do when I'm not working that is actually productive. Every now and then I get to hang out with friends, which is cool. (I don't know what I would do if I didn't.) I guess I'm just sick and tired of the same old same old and same old and same old. Things hardly ever seem new and exciting, and life gets old too fast. Its the daily grind of living that just gets me down. I hate it. Maybe I should find a band of Hippies to live with. UGH where are the 60's and 70's when I need them? lol. I guess I just have to remind myself that I only have a few more months left. Then I'll be able to get out of here.

Sorry for all of my pesimistic ranting that may have left you thinking that I just need to stop whining and deal with my life, but for some reason just ranting to anyone or even no one at all just makes me feel a little better. Sometimes I guess I just realize how much of my life has been wasted for stupid reasons and those are part of the reasons that I'm at where I'm at. Then I just beat myself up because of those things so much until I'm left with nothing but a broken bloody bruised heart that wants to be able to make up for all of my years with wrong focuses and wrong motives, but this steam train doesn't seem to have much acceleration. I guess I just have to take a look around Fort Kearney before I can make it to Oregon Country.

2 comments:

Lacee said...

Hmm.. it's your blog. You can "rant" about whatever you want. :D Sometimes, venting like that helps a lot. I'm not sure why... I think it helps get your thoughts together too. So, I know I don't mind reading your "whining". xD It's like a ginormous ongoing "about my life" page or something. Plus, everyone has those up times, and the down ones. With a blog, it's nice to look back and see where they've been.

Lovedeathsdeath said...

Thanks for the encouragement Lacee.