So, life is going good for me I guess. I like being back here in NC. My headlights are fixed, and they're brighter than ever. And I have 3 jobs to choose from. I'll probably end up at Sheetz if all goes well. It's a pretty good deal, and I've kinda wanted to work there for a while because its kinda close. Plus it just seems like it would be a cool place to work. Basically its coffee, food, and cash register. That's what it seems like. Plus I'll probably get to see quite a few people that I know a lot. Jobs where you see the same people every day, or no one at all just get kinda lonely. I don't mind being by myself, but when I'm supposed to be by myself I seem to not like it as much. Its just the psychological effect of not being in control of if I'm by myself or not. I mean I'm always in control of it, but when I have to be alone to make money to live with it kills me after a while. Even if I was a hermit, I'd have the choice of being with people. Yeah, you get my point.
Speaking of alonness... I went to the sunday school teacher's meeting today, and there's nobody within my age range that's helping with sunday school stuff. So I either hung with my mom, or sat by myself. And I always have different views on things from other people... ALWAYS. Its kinda difficult when you're sitting there with people and they're all talking like homeschooling is the greatest thing in the world, and nothing good comes from public schools. Umm... HELLO, look at who you're talking to. There's more to life than being prim and proper and knowing the Sunday school answer to everything. I finally spoke up, "Well I went to public school."
"Oh... Really, like completely? You've never been homeschooled?"
URGH. What is wrong with people? Sometimes they can't see that there's advantages and disadvantages to both. There are weirdos on both sides of the board. I know cool people that were homeschooled, and I know cool people that were publicschooled. Either way, you have to instill in the child good, Christian morals and how to apply them to the culture we live in- Balance. In life, there is always balance. I wish that I could just open up people's eyes to that. If you only had one side to your body you would fall over. If we were in any other relation from the sun we would freeze or burn. Its all in design.
Its really easy for me in life to feel alone sometimes. I want to take on these things. I want to take on the world and rally others for the same cause, but everyone else is content with sitting there and riding the wave. Riding down the river to the waterfall at the end. And once the edge is reached, there is no turning back. Its going to be too late.
Something needs to change. Something big needs to happen to wake people up to what's really going on with their life. We are all dying. That's how I see life. Everyday I live is a day closer to death. Once I'm dead, there's nothing I'm going to be able to do about it. That's why I hate when older people are like, "You'll have the rest of your life for that." Wathecrap!? This IS the rest of my life. I've known quite a few people that will never even make it to where I am now. The rest of their life ended two years before the current timeline of mine. Don't tell me I have the rest of my life like it's going to last forever, because its not. Mine is not and neither will yours. Do something about it rather than waiting for it to come. I guess most people don't see life that way, so that's why I always feel alone in my endeavors.
I want to be part of the culture by changing the culture to what it should be. Too many people my age just want to be part of the culture. Then there are those who may be a bit older that just want nothing to do with the culture entirely. If something is broken, then you need to do something to fix it. Especially when it is irreplaceable. People are the culture. You can't replace them. You can only do what you can to change them. And one person cannot lift a one million pound, but if a million people each lifted one pound they could lift the million pound object. Its that simple, but no one wants to see it.